March 12, 2012
Today seemed to take its own turn as I try to grasp life again and leave Facebook for some time so I can find me again breath life again and then it happen. My sister called me and told me that one of my (Facebook friend) a childhood friend mother had passed away today. The first thing I said was, “What No, total disbelief. Not again and not Miss Carol. My heart sink and I have to break my cover from facebook and I check for myself and see, please tell me it’s not true. Tina reminded me that just 7weeks to date now that we had the baby shower. I can’t believe that was only seven weeks ago it feels like ages but when you put the dates together it was and she was right just 7 adult weeks ago. My mine travel quickly back to that day Carol being the first to hug me and that quickly comfort me, and the most important thing of all before I left she told me that she loved me and I was her girl. I just wonder if she knew, if she felt it or was she just learning like I to just seemly love everyone and not wait, but say it the minute that your heart cries for it. I cried, now for the first time I was able to finally cry, and than before I totally lost it I looked up and said, God I love you adore you, you are my awesome creator, and you know the plans, and then I cried again.
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